To God, whoever you may be-
Today, I give You my prayer, for a colleague who recently just departed and is probably in Your hands now. It is such a wonder how this life works, the struggles, the wins, the defeats. Whatever it is that you’ve planned for each individual is incredibly amazing- to the point that it makes me feel in awe and at the same time, really sad about it.
Whatever the reason you have for taking away a person who’s been waiting for that ‘something’ her whole life- please help me understand. Help me understand that this is Your will, Your plan- and this has to have some kind of purpose as to why it happened. The only word that I could think of to describe this is “tragic”. But as sad as it may sound, inside this word is a seed- a seed of pure blessing, hope and love. I’d like to believe that I am a romantic, and this has got to be one of the greatest form of love people can give to another.
This colleague of ours have been married for quite a while (maybe even more than a decade as I’ve heard), and she had trouble conceiving a child because of certain health problems. Last year, 2020 (The pandemic year), they’ve been blessed- I’d like to say that it’s a real blessing and a miracle that she got pregnant. They’ve been waiting for this, and everyone of us who knew, was really, really happy for her. It’s that kind of happiness that’s so legit, that just by seeing her photos and posts, makes you want to cry.
She was already on her 36th month this January, but then just the other day, we’ve received the news that she suddenly passed because she had the pandemic virus (COVID-19) for a month already. Her body couldn’t take it, I guess, and I think her condition is very sensitive considering she was also pregnant and was even having health problems before. Our circle didn’t knew that she was suffering from the virus this previous month- no one of us knew.
They had the kid taken out of her via emergency CS, and I really wanted to know more than anything if the kid had made it, because I knew she was waiting for this little angel to be out here.
He did get out. It was a very touching news, that even though she was struggling for her life, deep within us we knew, that she was fighting, so this kid could be here with us and be able to say hello- because it’s something that she had been fighting for even before she got this virus. It is her goal, her purpose. And all the love and power that was remaining of her, I guess, she gave for this.
Not even an inch did I think that it was her fault that this had happened to her. Because I think some people would think that she caught the virus ’cause she was spending a lot of time outside- so she must’ve caught it somewhere or something like that- but there was never a feeling of blame on her in my heart for that. I’d like to think that this had happen because this has a purpose, and not because she’s been living her life with haste and carelessness. I’d like to believe that it’s like that.
It is beautiful, really, this life. No matter how imperfect it is as we all know it, you can’t deny that it can be captivating at times.
That baby boy is bunch of blessing- a living proof of true hope and love, and I wish that he will walk this earth knowing that even though this life has its own imperfections and troubles, it is still wonderful. I want him to know that his mom truly loves him, from the bottom of her heart, life and soul. I hope he grows a good man.
I also pray that You give her family, esp her husband, peace and strength through these trying times and may they understand the purpose of all this, within Your grace and with Your wisdom. I really hope they are okay.
I thank You also for making me realize that I only have this life, and I should treasure people around me more, ’cause we don’t know what would happen next but either way we should live this life fully and with contentment.
I know that You know from within me I still have some troubles in my heart, being and soul, and I still need some patience within me- I pray that you give me strength and better understanding of myself, so I could know my purpose and be within Your will.
I just have one thing to ask of you- keep everyone that I love and know safe and happy, that whatever happens to their life may they find peace, contentment, and be able to live their life with love.
Thank You Lord, and may Your will be done. I will be forever grateful for this gift of life.